I should have said....

So here I am, in the little tri-city area, which I thought was pretty big, but in mediation terms is quite small.  I have had many conversations with mediators in the past 6 months, and read many different forums/conversations on Linkedin  and have been told how difficult it is to sustain a career in mediation.  I have been well informed that those who teach mediation classes are not fully telling their students how difficult it is to make a living and that there are few who are able to make a killing off of it but the rest struggle.  Not surprisingly, this doesn't really phase me.  I feel well informed at the risks, I feel well informed that it will be a difficult path, I feel well informed that I'm going to have to work my ass off to get anywhere in this world of mediation.  But guess what...it would be the same with any business that I decide to go for!

One thing that I have come to realize is the lack of awareness that there is about mediation in the area I reside.  There is a lack of awareness of the benefits of the mediation process, the financial benefits of mediation, and a general lack of knowledge of restorative justice/mending relationships.  So what do I do?  I have read everything out there...there are some amazing people that take a lot of time out of their days to help others...Tammy Lenski, Diane Levin , Amanda Bucklow, Jeff Thompson, Cinnie Noble (Just to name a few) who have helped me really sit down and think about the ins and outs of mediation and what it means to be a not just a good mediator, but a great mediator.  I can honestly say I owe them a quite a bit for the wisdom that comes through their fingers and voices

Anyways, all this to say...I have a ton of work to do in my area!  I'm going to have to get out and talk to groups, write articles, shout mediation from the rooftops to get anywhere in this field...it is extremely overwhelming and extremely exciting and I look forward to the challenges ahead!  Stay tuned for more!

mediation awareness

you know it don't you...

Holy crap it's been a month already!  Brutal...my apologies.  Soooo anyways, I want to talk about a quote that I saw recently...I love it, it's superb.  Ready?  Here it is;

"People are usually more convinced by reasons they discover by themselves than by those found by others."

-Blaise Pascal
One of the things I like about this quote is the incredible amount of truth that it brings.  Let's think about this for a minute, what are you most likely to believe?  Someone telling you facts and/or reasons, or finding them out for yourself?  I think everyone will agree that you will be more convinced of something if you find it out for yourself first hand, right?

This is just one of the beautiful things I like about mediation.  When I am mediating a case between people, the two parties are more likely to come to an agreement if they talk to each other and find out things through their conversation rather then me telling them reasons on why they should agree.  This is why a huge part of the mediator is to facilitate the conversation, ask good questions, and uncover interests.

Everyone has problem solving skills, it's a matter of them using them effectively.  Many people don't realize the skills that they do have and it's part of the mediator's job to help that person uncover those skills and to put them in action.  So if your talking to someone about a problem they have with a friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, parent, or child, try asking them questions.  They know how to deal with the conflict at hand, they just need the right keys to unlock what they already know.  So before you spout off some advice for someone, ask them what they think they should do!